Who Has The Right-of-Way?

While driving in third world countries, the other guy always has the right of way (he also has the pistol).

Driving in developing countries is all about surviving: navigating intersections without traffic lights, knowing how to handle corrupt policemen, being cut off by truckers and tractors, fitting into spaces more narrow than your vehicle, slamming on your brakes for animal herds, and avoiding potholes which are more like chasms. Rolling down the window and folding in the side mirrors is as common as using your blinkers. A visiting American teenager, riding shotgun, exclaimed to me, “Dude! This would make a great video game.” I said, “Yeah, something like Frogger (but he didn’t know what in the world I was talking about). When coming to a mindless intersection, he asked, “Who has the right of way?” I said, “the other guy,” because, over a dozen times, I have seen half-drunk drivers pulling out pistols to solve insignificant traffic disputes “like real men.”

To survive on the roads, I suggest the following recipe: precool your temper with prayer and mix heaping portions of patience, caution and self-defense with just a pinch of agressiveness, stubborness, and idiocy. Use your horn liberally. If oncoming night traffic is blinding you with high beams, blind them back and they will get the point. Remember that tensing up your body will not protect your vehicle when it slams into potholes. Keep your emergency and break-down equipment current. Above all, when returning to your home country for furlough, be extra careful! What you now know is not at all reckless may be deemed otherwise by the patrolmen. If they stop you, be aware that you may have an undiscovered chip on your shoulder due to the respect you have lost for all those in that uniform!